Friday, May 25, 2007

Buzzword Bingo: Stakeholders

Mall University is currently trying to overhaul its system, as part of its ongoing effort to erase any indicators that it might still be a university. What this means is that every time I'm on campus, I get inundated (irradiated perhaps?) by jargon and buzzwords. I'll try to chart the evolution of corporate-speak here and its steady absorption by the university system.

Today's buzzword?
Stakeholders: That's right- they're no longer calling us "students" at our university. From now on, we're "stakeholders". Since they're now modelling the academic world after the corporate world, it makes more sense to think of us as stakeholders, and ergo this university as an enterprise. It's strange- on one hand, it's a very flattering thing to call us; it suggests that we have a part to play in this enterprise. On the other hand, while it's flattering to us, it's vaguely insulting to the University itself... Or, I think it's still called a University-I'll let you know what they decide to rename that.

6 comments:

Holly said...

So, you'll be renaming this site to Grad Stakeholder Madness?

Rufus said...

Well, rebranding it, yes.

Holly said...

Having shoveled excrement for corporate America for far too many years, I can tell you with some certainty that rebranding would be more effective and less popular if it involved white-hot iron hoisted out of the coals and applied to flesh more often than it actually does.

Rufus said...

It doesn't now?

Anonymous said...

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This is not satire?

...

Rufus said...

I wish!