They're Coming to Your Town- sort of like Invasion of the Body Snatchers by way of Fire Island (Invasion of the Hot Body Snatchers?), this documentary from the Family Association of Families, or something like that, promises to tell you about what will happen when gays invade your small town. It focuses on one town in particular:
''Residents of the small Arkansas town of Eureka Springs noticed the homosexual community was growing. But they felt no threat. They went about their business as usual. Then, one day, they woke up to discover that their beloved Eureka Springs, a community which was known far and wide as a center for Christian entertainment--had changed. The City Council had been taken over by a small group of homosexual activists.''
Hey, Ma and Pa Kettle, the Christmas Pageant is cancelled!! Mwah-ha-ha!!!
''The Eureka Springs they knew is gone. It is now a national hub for homosexuals. Eureka Springs is becoming the San Francisco of Arkansas.'' [Formerly Little Rock]
Meanwhile, in the Meth Belt, otherwise known as the ''moral backbone of America'', good Christian Nebraska parents are apparently preparing for the coming gay onslaught. The state made the mistake, when offering ''safe haven'' to any parent looking to abandon their children at Nebraska hospitals, of not specifying what they meant by ''child''. The idea was to prevent ''dumpster babies'', but...
''Sure enough, 18 teenagers — five 17-year-olds, two 16-year-olds, six 15-year-olds, two 14-year-olds, three 13-year-olds — have been abandoned, along with eight children who were 11 or 12. Five of the children dropped off have been from out of state.''
Lest I remind you, this is exactly how Children of the Corn started...