Thursday, June 09, 2005

Last Night's Dream

I was at the mall with my old friend Mike McCaughey from High School. I haven't seen him since then. I was 17 and got my first girlfriend and didn't hang out with my friends anymore. I know- it was lame... I was 17, okay? But, he was a good friend and I know he thought I was lame and I've always felt bad about that.

In the dream, we were hanging out, having a good time, and I started feeling terrible because I knew it was just a dream. Also, Mike went into the Marines after school and, in the dream, he had to go back to Iraq. I worry about that a lot, and have to admit that sometimes I look at the List to make sure he's not on it. Also, I feel guilty lately because those guys who are over there getting killed are doing so at our behest. Meanwhile, I'm here reading Finnegans Wake for the thirtieth time. Don't get me wrong- I don't feel obligated to go, but I have mixed feelings about what I should be doing. If you follow the link on the side to A Soldier's Thoughts , you can read the thoughtful writing that has brought the war to my own thoughts recently.

In the dream I was conscripted too. Since I have some academic background, I was put to work for the military (and I'm not making this up) writing "conservative editorials". We were in this room like a sweatshop typing the things out, and I kept thinking that I would show them by slipping in old punk lyrics. It was actually pretty funny in retrospect.

And, if anybody reading this runs into Mike, tell him I said hello.

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